ZThemes

doffodil:

I’m aware of all this information at this point in time

I think she just wanted me to shut up.

Maybe I’d just be a bad mom or something because I’d just be like “Hey walk it off kiddo you’ll be cool”

although i tend to shout shut up to my cat when he won’t stop meowing for no reason and then i pick him up and tell him in the baby voice "you’re gonna get shaken baby syndromeeee yesyouareee"

Shutting up children seems like a complicated process.

doffodil:

Why is alka seltzers jingle ‘oh what a relief it is’ though

I mean

The last time I drank that I was five and I had slipped and like slapped all the breath out of my lungs against the concrete and mom just poured me a mug of tap water and plopped some alka tabs in there and told me it was supposed to help

And it sucked

I was miserable and the alka seltzer was supposed to fix it

But it was like trying to drink fizzy lava topped with pop rocks while drowning

Although now that I’m old enough to read medicine labels for myself I’m aware that that was a load of garbage

But still.

The Jingle goes like “Plop plop, fizz fizz, oh, what a relief it is!”.

And apparently it’s good for like colds and heartburn.

I’m not sure why your mom would give it to you for slipping and falling, really. 

Like…I don’t even know the logic behind that use.

ultraviolentdiamonds:

Droog get your hand out of Deadeye’s boxers he is a Gentleman unlike someone

ultraviolentdiamonds:

Didn’t I tell you that I was just getting started drawing porn

NSFW Under the cut.

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ultraviolentdiamonds:

image

NSFW drawing under the cut! You have been warned!

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Dedan from OFF has Yaoi hands text it

So I can hear my boyfriend outside choking on his weed basically and i just

smh

i didn’t think i was dating a NOOB

doffodil:

How do you get on the internet and not pretend to be a fictional character

You just go with it man